When my Tita was married to her American husband here in the Philippines, she and her hubby was accompanied by her hubby's parents, Marlys and Howard. The elder couple was very sweet to each other despite their age. My tita told me that for the past year that they have been together, they have loved each other more and more. And to add up, this couple has a very rough start to begin with.
Jean Marlys Burgeson was raised and born in North Dakota. She lives with a quite well-off family. At the age of 20 she met a farmer's son in the name of John Howard Langemo. Howard is of a Norwegian descent that migrated in North Dakota. Days passed and the two started dating and at the age of 22, they got married. Their love produced 3 loving sons and my tita's hubby is the youngest. Marrying at quite a young age they are now free from their parents consent but is also thriving to support the family. Sooner, Marlys got pregnant so this means Howard needs to find a stable job. Then, Howard found a job being a Insurance Agent to an Insurance Company. However, he needs to find another job to support her wife's pregnancy, to pay their house and to provide their daily needs. Howard then found a job as a caretaker of a property from someplace (I didn't get where the place is). Years passed and they have all three grown up sons that is going to college. And at that point in time, Marlys is an English teacher and Howard is still an Insurance Agent but they are planning to have a business.
Howard (Left), Marlys (Right) and my cousin Andrew (Center)
After their eldest son graduated, they have put up a small pharmacy at a commercial place near their house. And after some quite time, their sons decided that the couple is now stable to live by themselves and the three of them should live in their own as well.
Going back to Howard and Marlys, years passed and they have both supported each other to support their needs. But at year 2005 or 2004, Marlys was diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease. It is a degenerative disease that affects the memory. When Howard found out about the disease that struck the one he loves, he felt awful about his wife but he has to be strong for her and still love her with all of his heart.
Marlys attitude began to change because of the disease. During the first year with the said disease, Marlys is sometimes depriving herself from eating and sleeping. She sometimes throw tantrums when she cannot find her glasses when in fact it is in her pocket. But with this tantrums, Howard always know how to calm her sweetie. Shopping. Marlys really loves to shop and she is a fairly fashionable aged lady. She always seems to it that she is properly dressed for an occasion and even inside the house.
Marlys and Howard (right to left)
The second year was a bit harsher. The lady is forgetting thing that she usually do, except shopping of course. She barely practiced her activities of daily living. Her abilities was lessened because the disease is affecting her motion. But despite all of this hardship, Howard is just there for Marlys. Giving her food, reminding her of the timeslot of her favorite TV Show, changing her socks and even removing her underwear when is about to pee and especially Howard is there when Marlys is on for a midnight shopping.
Howard loves Marlys so much that he volunteered to take care of Marlys instead of giving her to the home for the aged. He didn't even get a nurse to take care of his wife just to have quality time taking care of her.
In the peak of Marlys disease, she almost forgot everything, even shopping. She barely remember names, how to eat, almost everything. She sometimes can't recognize her sons but there is one thing she cannot forget, her husbands name. Howard is the only name Marlys can say without even thinking alot. He knows Howard even he is meters aways from here. She maybe the woman that almost forgot everything but her husband.
Love can truly be a magical thing. Despite a disease that struck the brain, there is a heart that will remind you of things that is beyond your thinking but deep inside your feelings.
Year 2007, just few months after our Christmas visit in Minnesota where my tita resides, Marlys died. I am not sure if it is because of the disease or because of the complications. At that moment, I can tell that Howard is at his saddest. She lost the girl she loved the most.
Marlys' Funeral Invitation for her wake.
I blogged about this story because it's Christmas time again and we just received our yearly letter from Howard saying his Hello's and Hi's to us here in the Philippines.
Hope you enjoyed it :))
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